Hey.

Im sitting down to blog considering I’ve completely lost my voice and if I tried to voice my feels it’d come out as a croak. 

 It’s been a while hasn’t it?

If you don't follow me over on social media (here and here) then you wouldn’t have known that I’d spent the last week in  Vegas for my Birthday. It was a blast and to blame for the afore mentioned lack of voice. Delayed hangover probs.

Point numero uno. I really miss blogging. Although Im sure you’ve heard me wail that before in the last 6 months and are like GOD LILY YOU ARE SO FLAKEY. But bare with me here.

I’ll openly admit I’ve gone off blogs in the last year or so. I don’t know why, I think I finally  *got* youtube and now I spend my days watching kids toy demos and watching people do fast food reviews in their cars. Yeah the weird part of Youtube. 

But there is still a soft spot in my heart for blogging and after a quick refresh of my Bloglovin feed, out with the old and in with the new I feel a bit more inspired too actually tap out some things. 

Part of it is the fear of coming back and part of it just feeling like Im not that good at it? Im no Wordsworth and my copy could be greatly improved but at the same time it’s cathartic and nice to just put some words on the screen. Plus I can type from behind my screen in my jim jams pretending Im looking FAB even though Im currently wearing a Monument Valley Hoodie, ugly off white socks and my Christmas Jim Jams.

I’ve been feeling p. content recently. I feel like I’ve finally worked out all the kinks in my life and feel at a place where I can move forward and most importantly upwards. I had a wobbly few months earlier in the year where I thought my anxiety was going to get the best of me but after a few deep breathes and some Beyonce on repeat I feel like myself again.

Im generally a pretty self aware and self assured person. The kind of person who can support themselves and doesn't need other people to make them feel good. Most of the time I can get myself out of funks and feeling like poop but y’know those periods where the littlest thing can send you off on a path of self destruction? Yeah one of those?

I think that having down periods is part of being a human and it’s perfectly normal to not always be 100% on it. Social media makes us feel like we have to be up and at ‘em all the time but it’s cool to have a few days to yourself focusing on your own mental health every now and again.

Stopping myself from overworking myself and stressing myself out has really changed my ability to cope with the work I have on my plate and the things I do and thats cool.

Uh, What else. Im not sure where to go from here. A lil life update, well Im in the process of buying a house. I don’t really want to move from my flat as I do love it but I know I should be investing my money in property rather than sitting on it waiting for a rainy day. 

Why isn’t stuff like this taught at school? I’ve read so much about house buying and mortgages I don’t even know who I am anymore. I feel like a kid who was accidentally allowed to grow up and do all these adult things even though I have no idea.

Other than that my life is back to it’s overwhelmingly normal self. Which to be honest is when Im most happy. I like working on my own personal projects and videos and doing simple things like going for chips on the beach or going for a bike ride. I've learnt to focus on me time and doing the things I want to do rather than keeping up with the Joneses. 

I’ve tapped out a few more posts for the rest of the week today but who knows how long this burst will last. If you’re still here then cheers for sticking around. You’re the real MVP. Ta x